Every once in a while I get very personal on this blog. Today is one of those days. I’m going to be alarmingly real here. This is for you photographers. The events of the past couple of years of my business have been circulating throughout my mind over the last several weeks as I’ve been...
Category Archives: + Personal
six days… | Phoenix Photographer | Sandi Bradshaw |
Sandi – simply put. . .you speak for a lot of people, photographers or not. Everybody feels this way at some point, don’t they? I think we can all get caught up in the mundaneness of our lives, work, because, let’s face it. . it is a grind. BUT – I think the sheer fact that you recognize your routine, and WANT to do better and something different shows that you ARE living life and not just existing. Trust me when I say, I see a LOT of people who just exist in this life, for various reasons, and they are okay with that. To me – that is the definition of existing – just not having a desire to do better or having the courage to try something new and different. Even though I haven’t met you, I can tell you are NOT in that category! GOOD LUCK, and ENJOY your trip to Atlanta. . breathe some new air, and I personally cannot WAIT to see what you do next. Thanks for the honesty – you are so inspirational.
It’s funny, as I started to read this a video came to mind that I thought I might recommend to you. As I continued reading though, I saw that you have already seen it and have been affected by it as I was the first time I watched it.
This photography thing is quite the journey and it’s filled with all those things you mention here. It’s a roller coaster ride with some amazing highs and some crazy lows.
You are an amazing artist and if I could make it to one of your workshops I’d probably follow you around like your love child! I would do the same with Zach. Have a great time. Soak it all in. Enjoy your journey!
So well worded Sandi. Time passes so quickly and sometimes I feel that I am just existing. Thank you for sharing all of this and enjoy your trip to Atlanta.
Gosh it is that time of the year isn’t it? I needed to read your blog and watch Zach’s video again. Yes we all go through it. Hopefully we can all come out of it.
Thanks so much for sharing!
Oh Wow..I don’t even have a business but I feel exactly the same at times. Photography becomes overwhelming and I want to cry because I love it so much but it is letting me down (or I am letting myself down) and I don’t know which way to go. Sometimes we just need a break and we need time to get back on our feet. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. We all go through tough times, but most important thing is to keep pushing and to keep growing. Your work is amazing and you don’t need words, your photographs speak for themselves. I always look forward to seeing your new work and your blog is one of my favorites. Have fun in Atlanta.
O M G….
As I sit here and read this entry, I nod repetitively and agree and identify with EVERYTHING you have said! I am in that same rut, slump, hole, whatever you want to call it. I crave to be something truly spectacular and not cookie cutter. I feel unique for a moment and then turn around and see a hundred+ people just like me. I do not stand out. I am not an original. I just blend. I do NOT wish to blend. I’m not saying I crave stardom or fame either, but I would love to deem myself truly worthy of being an artist.
Anyway.. I could go on and on and on about this topic. It’s WILD that you would write about this today. Your words are EXACTLY how I feel. I need to find myself some inspiration, confidence, and direction. Thank you for posting this. It’s great to see a photographer whom I look up to, struggle with these very same issues. I mean.. I’m not “happy” that you are struggling…. lol just makes me feel normal perhaps.
Good luck with your soul search. Being around Zach will be INCREDIBLE no doubt. I am so jealous you are going to hang with him!!! That will surely light a fire under your bum if nothing else does!!!! ENJOY that. I wish I could afford to meet him. :O)
Thanks for posting this topic too. I look forward to seeing what your outcome will be. As for me? I need a project to focus on. Something that pushes me to be better. Something that is from my soul and not just the robotic shutter clicks that I seem to fall into client after client after client…..
All my best!
<3
J
Thanks so much for sharing your real self. WOW … your posting and the video really spoke to me today!!! I have been struggling for the last year and a half trying to get a better “balance” in my life. I have a FT job and do photography PT. That pretty much means my family gets the left overs. I so don’t want it to be that way. I am currently reading an awesome book called “It All Goes Back in the Box” which basically is saying when life is done what will you find in your box. I want my box to have relationships … not just a career, possessions, etc. that we all strive to obtain. I just wish it were easier to obtain a balance. It’s a constant struggle of which we all must work at. Thanks again for sharing and being genuine!
WOW! better yet…W.O.W!!!!! How is it no matter what level photographer we are, we all feel the same. Interesting…enlightening…hopeful. I had not ever seen that video and I will bookmark this so I can watch it when I NEED it. I hope you have an incredible trip to Atlanta are are fed something your soul is looking for. I’m still hoping to be in your March class…too feed from you, which is what I personally need right now…I’ve been pressing dear hubby to make the trip with me so he can see friends we haven’t seen in too many years. Until then…have a great, rewarding trip!
This is a beautifully genuine post. I love it. I understand why we think we HAVE to do things in the photography business… but really… I don’t think we have to do anything that isn’t authentically us. I think you can blog whatever you want. Or not at all. If you really hate it then don’t put yourself through it or redefine it.
I’m really excited for you to go to the Z. Arias workshop. To do something different. To reevaluate and change things up. Even if outwardly to all of us things look the same you can still change things up on your side of the screen.
I completely get what you’re saying. I’m planning my own “life intervention” as I type this. But as long as we know that we CAN change things it’s less depressing while we’re in the midst of it.
Normally, I’ll admit when I get new blogs in my inbox…I look at the pictures. Trying to find something new or inspiring. So, as any other day I got your blog in my inbox…opened it…scanned down, no pic, huh…then the words that caught my eye Inadequacy vs Self Confidence. I scrolled back up to the top..I had to read this. Why, today has been a day like you wrote about. And as I read your words, I started to tear up….I’m NOT ALONE!! And I know this may seem like a totally pointless comment…but Thank You,Sandi…Thank You for writing what you wrote today which seemed to be a personal message to me.
thank you for sharing so intimately. wherever the journey takes you, i pray you find peace. wanting nothing more than to “break into the business” myself, it’s always a blessing to find posts like these in the blogs of photogs i follow. it keeps the dream real for me and helps me to gauge the growth of my dream.
You are speaking my language with this post Sandi!! I can SO relate to everything you’re saying. I especially feel the same way about my blogging & it brings me down too often. So glad you get to go have fun and find new inspiration in Atlanta. It sounds like perfect timing for this trip! My “thing” that I’m doing for myself, my business, and for new inspiration is coming to your workshop in February.
I appreciate how real and transparent you are on your blog. Enjoy your trip & I look forward to getting to learn from you at the workshop!
Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. Plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you a future and a hope.” Keep your focus on what is true and real and unchanging. THAT is what will get you through these ruts that all people, regardless of their calling in life, will go through. It is sometimes the only light we can see. I was reminded of this verse at Imaging USA yesterday. He made you with this ability and passion for HIS glory. Use it for Him. I was very moved by the video several weeks ago when I first saw it. I hope you can have an impact on Zack as much as he will have an impact on you.
THANK YOU for this. This is how I too feel, it is a struggle. The need to create in constant competition with the other needs and wants in your life is hard. Thank you for this. Its nice to know Im not alone. Hope Atlanta is full of epiphany.
Ditto-ditto-ditto all the comments. I feel like I am drowning right now. I cannot find the balance between my passion that consumes me and my family & all that is required there. I am so thankful for the love of this art form, but I can not get on top of it. Maybe I’m not suppose to; maybe that’s part of the creating. I’m just tired though, and your post brought me to tears. But it also gives comfort at the same time. Thank you for sharing your heart and putting it out there.
Sandi love, what courage you have. I miss you dear. I’d LOVE to chat when you are feeling up to it. You speak for all of us. You are a talented photographer…but not only that, you are a TRULY uniquely genuine, warm and thoughtful individual and that I think has been a huge part of your wild success. I am happy to know you AND I know that whatever path you choose, it will be blessed. Call or email me. Let’s talk. Have an amazing time with Zack…I know you will. xoxo
What is it?!! Why does this resonate so deeply in all us photographers?!! Does having a photog business have to be this way? We do it because we love it….yes, but in the madness we hate what it does to us. We don’t want it to suffocate us and we don’t mean for it to take over our life, but it is a constant battle. And now it is out slow season, but often we don’t even allow ourselves to really slow down. We need to do this for the website and redo our pricing and on the list goes! I have been fighting with these questions also! Thanks for being so honest, Sandi! You have touched so many of us. Let us know what your heart finds. Blessings!
Thank you.
Holy cow, finally some who is brave enough to tell the truth about this business and put it all out there. For being someone who doesn’t like to write, this is extremely well written. As many of your commenters have already stated, they commiserate with you, as do I. We all feel that pressure to do it all, be everything to everyone, keep passionate and innovative, keep people interested and coming back… but at what cost? I hope you found a respite in Atlanta and get your mojo back. We all need some inspiration at times and someone to tell us it’s okay to feel like this and it’s okay to disappear for a while. Let us know how it goes!!! xoxo
HI Sandy! I was just scrolling through your blog, admiring your work – and I come across THIS post. OMG, HOW did you take everything I feel about my work and put it into your words???
I hope you enjoyed your 6-days-with-Zack and are feeling renewed and inspired, I’d love to hear how it went!
jen
[...] up is a snippet from Treasure the Time regarding this sometimes consuming business. I agree, it is SO easy to get consumed with work. [...]
Dé-ja-vu … | Phoenix Photographer | Sandi Bradshaw

For those of you who have followed my blog for over a year…you might remember around this time last year when I came down with Valley Fever and Pneumonia. That was sure a couple weeks full of fun! Well…here I am…almost exactly a year later and I’ve got symptoms that strongly resemble what I had...
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Love moms dress! Beautiful! Can you believe we have 100 degree weather in October? What a great idea to head up to Sedona for your session!
Wow Sandi! I will be praying that you and your entire family’s health is restored quickly. And that image is gorgeous! Love the colors! Oh, and it has been HOT here in So Cal! Gotta love 104 in October. Feel better.
It is no fun to be sick, I hope your symptoms go away soon.
This is a gorgeous family portrait. I love your work and I always look forward to blog updates.
Hope you feel better soon! This is a stunning image of a gorgeous family. Can’t wait until you share the rest.
Hi Sandi, Beautiful. Nice to see some fall color! I am sorry to hear you are sick. My family just got over the swine flu so there seems to be alot of crud going around! Hope you can kill the bug soon!
Carrie
bummer, Sandi. i hope you and your family get to feeling a better.
BTW…this image is fab (as usual)! love the fall colors!
i LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this picture, more please
ohmyword!! everything about this picture is FABULOUS!! I love the fall colors, that lil’ boy is ADORABLE, wittle girlz are the CUTEST!! *love her little dress*, the dad looks so awesome, and the mom’s DRESS!!!! OMYGOODNES!! I just can’t get over it!! beautifulbeautifulfamily, beautifulbeautifulpicture =) loves<3
ick. feel better. wow, amazing family shot. LOVE THE CLOTHING!!!
Can’t wait to see more from this session!
a sweet reminder… | Scottsdale Senior Photographer | Sandi Bradshaw |

Today I’ve just been playing…in fact, it’s been such a wonderful day…me and the kids all slept in a bit today…jammies til noon…pancakes for lunch…my boys hung out in true brotherly fashion today…it was just a very good day. So…since all was peaceful and I had decided to take the day off today…I decided to...
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Beautiful image and awesome reminder, Sandi. I’m so thankful that He is, and that I know peace in His grace.
Girlfriend, you rock the Seniors! ROCK Star Senior Photographer!!!!
Thats an awesome reminder from God that I am very much in need of in these times. Thankyou for sharing that and your wonderful photography!
I spent my morning yesterday just looking through your post! I love your photos! God has certainly blessed you with an amazing talent and it is great to see you use it to share about Him!!!
This is such a complimentary pic!! The BEAUTIFUL miss b. goes with the BEAUTIFUL scripture verse. I LOVELOVELOVE!!!! <3<3
GOOD GREIF!!!! THOSE EYES!!!! i’m in awe!!!! =)
<3<3<3<3
{dear} sarah… | Phoenix Child Photographer | Sandi Bradshaw |

Today is your birthday…and I have been thinking of you almost constantly since last night. Although we’ve never met, your life has significantly impacted my own. Today…your birthday…I watched your son swim with his children…your grandchildren. I watched him laugh with them…play with them…love them. And I asked myself lots of questions…questions that I may...
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Sandi,
These are the very best kinds of pictures to take and to spend time on. Clients are forgotten, but these precious moments never will be, now that you’ve taken the time to capture them in this way. Sacrifices… not always. Congratulations on a day of celebrating, for finding good in the bad. These are absolutely beautiful, some of my favorites of your work that I’ve seen.
Heidi
OMG Sandi, I just read this post and cried. It is so sad, and so touching, and so eloquently written. It breaks my heart. The images that go along with it are beautiful too. I just dont know what to say. In spite of what happened 27 years ago, it appears your husband overcame that huge challenge in his life and grew into a strong and loving man. You have a beautiful family and I know you cherish them all deeply.
….I’m still in tears over your post.
Its amazing what you shared here. I could basically write the same thing for my husband. Life on earth can be very sad! Your husband must be an amazing person and I pray he only finds his worth in our heavenly father… She has missed out on 14 blessings and that is not even counting her own children and YOU!
Sandi- Your post so moved me. Although my scenario is a bit different, my father left me 24 years ago (I was 15) by suicide. The sentiments you wrote spoke to me. I think of what he has missed not knowing my husband or my children. My husband (who has a very present mother and father and has never suffered a great loss) can not relate, he tries to comfort me, but I know he feels helpless to ease the pain of my loss. Your phrase, “I don’t pretend to understand” was so profound to me, because I am now 38 and my father was 37 when he passed. “I don’t pretend to understand” how he could leave his family, how I could ever leave mine. Thank you for your honestly and for such a touching post. You have reached across the miles with your art, but also with your heart. Thank you! Heather-Charlotte, NC
What a touching emotion filled post. I think we can all learn from each other through our mistakes and achievements. Thank you for sharing, it has brought me to see my family and myself (as a wife, mom, sister, daughter, aunt and friend) in a new light.
Today (next day) is MY birthday and when I read this post I cried. (Thanks for that Sandi!) My kids greeted me with hugs, kisses and hand-drawn birthday cards. Being without them would be like being without air. Cannot imagine choosing to be without air. Nothing can change the past, but we can learn from it. Our history, however painful, makes us what we are today and, if for nothing else, for that you can be grateful that this person chose to do what she did. Your children and family are beautiful, your images lovely as always. Thank you for sharing Sandi.
Oh my. I don’t know you and only just started following your blog… The images are amazing, as always. Just looking at those make my heart smile. But your words…. Oh, my heart aches. Tears. I’m so thankful to our Heavenly Father that He stepped in and provided a way for your husband to escape what was put on him. What a legacy! I too grew up in a not so great household, though my parents didn’t leave us (although sometimes I longed that they would). Now that I am a parent myself, I find myself pondering HOW…. HOW could they possibly have done us the way they did. The love in my heart… the indescribable emotion …. how I feel about those precious souls… what I would do for them…. what I don’t do for them… Praise God the cycle stopped and your precious children will never know that pain.
Wow, Sandi! That is so beautifully written. I’m glad you are blessed with such a happy family, and you are able to mark sadness with such joyous moments.
i like what heidi wrote (i don’t know her, just liked her comment). well said and i just had to say that i love how bright, fresh, and colorful your images are. awesome!
sandi, you have such a gift of expressing yourself in photos and words. i can’t wait to meet you in august at the workshop!
Ohhhh goodness! You are all so sweet to take the time to respond to my “personal” post. Thank you all for your sweet words and in several cases…your empathy. My husband has come out on the other side of what life dealt him as such a great dad with such a healthy outlook on life. It’s amazing…and a good reminder to me that our pasts don’t have to define us. Thanks again for all of your sweet sentiments! It means a lot to me to hear from my blog readers…so thanks for that! And…Heather and Moria…I’m sorry that you’ve experienced something similar.
( I hope that it’s made you stronger and better parents!
) Blessings ya’ll!
Sandi, your blog posting was by far the most poignant “letter” I have read. As a therapist I have learned to not judge. It is impossible for any one of us to know what experiences an individual endures that leads them to make the choices they make. As a mother it is impossible to NOT feel the hurt and sadness these children must have experienced. The blessing in this is that our present life is not dictated by our history. Your husband has defined who he is as a father and it is clear in no way does it resemble his own childhood. Praises to him for rising above! (BTW, when I met him it was clear his love and devotion to you. What a true man!!)
A pretty {sweet} opportunity… | Senior Photographer | Sandi Bradshaw |

Warning…after writing this little bit of a novel…I realized that it was a bit of a novel…sorry for the rambling tonight! Read on!… Today was such a crazy day…the kind of day where you’re just on the go non-stop and you’re so busy that you don’t even realize how tired you are until you sit...
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OMG! i can’t wait! i will be reading the MCP blog every day!!!
you are amazing!
btw – your son (the writer) DEFINITELY gets that
talent from his mommy. i can’t stop thinking about what you
wrote about your brother. it was so touching, honest, and beautiful.
Sandi,
You are amazing!! Can’t wait to find you on MCP Blog!! I enjoyed reading your “novel” about your boys. How proud you should be of them. They grow up soooo fast. Good luck with your decision about schooling for your boys. Thanks for sharing.
Yay! I am so happy that you are going to be on Jodi’s blog. And, that you are going to be featuring Senior Photography. I am slowly building my senior business and cannot wait to hear what you have to say. I so wish I could come to your workshop. Do you have a date for your next one yet? And I am thrilled to hear how well your kids are doing in school. Blessings to you and your family.
Sandi,
I “supplement” my kids schooling. At one time, prior to seperation and divorce, the desire was to homeschool (and still is if finances would permit) and I feel that that original philosophy and the start my children were given still exists even as my oldest turns 16 (and will be a sophmore too) and my youngest turns 11(5th grade next year). Never pass up a learning oppurtunity! We elaborate on math at the grocery store and we are HUGE readers and often attend local author and book events.
I truly feel that my children’s education is a partnership between every teacher each has had, my children as the student and myself as a parent. I try very hard to be envolved and connected with each teacher and although grades are given I am more concerned about WHAT my children are learning than the grade that comes home.
Perfect example is that although both have been tested as reading well above their grade levels, both in 3 and 4 grades were shown to be reading at a high school level. My son, at 10, has read The Narnia series as well as Harry Potter and can give you a synposis of each. My daughter in the 6th grade tackled Little Women, unabridged…but both cannot spell themselves out of a wet paper sack. The irony!
Although I understand the loss of the flexibility keep in mind that you don’t have to abandon the idea of Homeschooling…consider supplementing…isn’t that essentially what we do as parent giving our kids vitamins!?
ENJOY this approaching season and rest in the comfort that you have equiped your boys with a wonderful foundation during your homeschooling years! A strong foundation is essential and those lessons will never leave them!
And too what a blessing that you are able to place them in a Christian school!!! Take those as comforts!!!
Teeheehee…so there is my novel?!
Thank you again for sharing your love! Of photography and the precious love as a Mother to your sons!
Truly!
Michell
WOW! What a great opportunity! Looking forward to seeing your posts on Jodi’s blog! How cool. Great work and love your senior shots!!!
Wow! I am so happy I found you! What an inspiration! I have two boys of my own and struggle with balancing work and mom duties. We have considered home schooling also as our oldest will be going onto kindergarten. Your work is so beautiful! Will def be following your work! Thanks!
hopped over here from jodi’s blog, love your first post and look forward to the rest…your work is amazing! i can totally relate to your post here, i homeschooled my kids(just for 4 years tho so my season wasn’t as long) and when the time came to make the transition to school i was sad too! i was worried about the same things but the kids were excited about their new journey and the transition was easy as pie for them – i cried for several days after dropping them off tho
i’ll say a prayer for you as you venture into a new season, God bless!
Yay Sandi! Can’t wait to read your stuff on Jodi’s blog! And yes, you are far too young to have a teenager!! FAR. TOO. YOUNG.



21 comments